Tuesday, August 9, 2011

to be near


Sometimes, in the late afternoon,
I need to lie down.
Tired.
In search of quiet. Solitude.
A respite from the clamor,
the busyness of the day.
I'll escape and you'll find me.
I have a magnetism, it seems.

It happens
whenever and wherever 
I'm sitting or needing to sit.
The call: "Sit by me, Mom."
You tussle with the others, 
Eager for undivided mother-love
connection.

But when I'm on that bed,
whether you are two or twenty,
you'll find that familiar place by my side.

"Let's get cozy."
The little you will find enclosure,
that hollow C-curve cradle, 
my body formed around you.
We are one again.
United.
Your heart rhythm slowing to mine.
Snuggling close, I feel
that moist skin
damp hair,
that warm, sweet exhale on my face.
We'll just rest together.

"Can I lay by you?"
The big teenage you will seek me
not just for the physical
contact 
or presence,
though I'm seeing more and more
how much you still need that  "Can you rub my back?" touch,
but those other times, it seems 
all you need are these ears of mine
(yet another part of my body)
Or sometimes, all you need is the
peaceful silence between us.
Just my presence. 
It's enough.

Such sweet, such tender
motherhood gifts are these.
This nearness.
This emotional,
this physical closeness.
This need to be one again.
Both your need
and my need
met.
I'm not sure it will ever cease.

Remembering
my own mother
picking up my thirty something year old self
and slowly rocking us both in the chair
in the quiet
of her room.
Amazed that even then
I needed that.
And seeing now that
She needed that, too.

Some things never change.


3 comments:

  1. Love this poem - it's from a mother's core no doubt!

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  2. so, I am not the only one who needs an afternoon nap even if for just 15 minutes. I loved this. Very Sweet.

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